015 – Ready Number One (2018 Film)

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Great news: we managed to get a week in without having to talk about a new school shooting! That’s right, this episode’s school shooting discussion is about the same ones as last week. What a treat! But it’s not all bad – we’ve also got an extremely high-brow joke about the Forbidden Substance. And no, I’m not talking about the doja we’re blowing! Haha! That’s a thing people say, right?

Featuring LaurenPatrickSamLinus, and Josh.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Demi Adejuyigbe – Rejected Theme Song from READY PLAYER ONE

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014 – Crimes Committed by Strong Bad

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Sooner or later, we’re going to have to stop even mentioning how bad every week is. Hey, bad week! Take our hand as we trudge through a river of bad news and you shall be rewarded with some great* impressions and discussions of our favorite Wikia sites. Sometimes you just have to do anything you can possibly do to stay off topic. Hey, y’all remember Chuck? *note: impressions may not actually be great. Also, here’s the Justin Trudeau emoji.

Featuring PatrickSamMatt, and Zach.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
DRYNX – Brown Wine

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013 – Stephen Hawking’s Toe Destruction

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This awful week is finally over! Friends, your hosts are back in the studio and just cannot wait to talk about their favorite personality who made headlines this week, Jake Paul. We also mourn the loss of Stephen Hawking as well as “mourn” Rex Tillerson’s firing, and we celebrate the kids who stuck it to old people this week. Brooks also gets bullied, and we still cannot stop saying the word “yeeks,” sorry.

Featuring Lulu, Lauren, Brooks, Caroline and Josh.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Jake Paul – It’s Everyday Bro

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012 – Women Virginia

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Ladies, rev up your fryers! It’s International Women’s Day, and McDonald’s has a treat for you: it’s the letter W! Aren’t you glad? In case that’s not enough to make your week great, Donald Trump is getting sued, and video games are illegal. Hooray! Look’s like God’s been watching Game of Thrones, because women are finally on top (of a pole outside of your local McDonald’s).

Featuring Patrick, Sam, Matt, Caroline, and Zach.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Justin Timberlake – I’m Lovin’ It

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011 – Leftists Love Cool James

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Great news: this week was relatively less of a total nightmare than recent weeks! That means we get to have a lighthearted episode again, thank god. This week, Brooks drinks intersectional racism juice, Bill Gates drinks doodoo water, and we invent a new slogan for Fiverr. There’s also a discussion of Donald Trump’s thiccness that killed Luna. Whoops! Guess that Patreon goal came true sooner than we expected! (cough cough money please cough)

Featuring Luna, Brooks, Eddy, Josh, and Lauren.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Brad Paisley – Accidental Racist (feat. LL Cool J)

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010 – Are You Smarter Than a High Schooler?

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We did it! Ten whole episodes! To celebrate, we discuss the Republican Wild West fantasy, Marco Rubio getting owned by teenagers, the NRA wanting no scrubs, and our milk problems. We promise not to talk about that Garfield thing anymore, and I can say that because Matt’s not here this week.

Featuring Linus, Caroline, Zach, and Sam.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Rush – Anthem

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009 – Secret Patreon Garfield Comics

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Hello, friends. This episode starts with an apology for how heavy the last one was, and then immediately becomes extremely heavy because we live in a nightmare world. We do our best to keep things light on this podcast as much as we can, but!!! You know!!! Fortunately, we managed to get some great goofs in about video game titties and Jon Arbuckle’s questionable but 100% canonical beverage choices.
(Note: when we’re talking about Subnautica, we mistakenly refer to the Funnie Attack Helicopter Tweet as being from the lead developer – we meant sound designer. Whoops!)

Featuring Luna, Evan, Matt, Patrick, and Sam.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Waka Flocka Flame – Hard in da Paint

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008 – TRUST the Police

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This week, HKIPGTD officially crosses the Thicc Blue Line. We have two new hosts to help us dance on Tom Brady’s football grave, figure out what the economy is, celebrate MLK Jr.’s sweet new spokesperson gig, and lay bare the many, many sins of Quizno Totino’s (Quentin Tarantino). Plus: Chips for women, Lopunny’s sex positivity, and Valentine’s Gay.

CW for this ep: Sexual assault and rape, from roughly 28:30 to 46:00.

Featuring Josh, Lauren, Zach, Caroline and Evan.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Baked Alaska – We Love Our Cops (Official Video) PRO-COP PRO-MILITARY ANTHEM WOW!!!

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007 – Henry Krangsinger

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What’s up, gamers? This week we’re talking about a variety of topics, some bad, some worse. The HKIP gang weigh in on Chelsea Manning’s weird Cernovich thing, Woody Allen defenders, and Trump’s fun Mueller problem. Also, we finally make our opinions on cops known! After that, we clear out our backlog of questions, fantasize about Joe Kennedy’s wet mouth, and decide once and for all when it’s okay for white people to say the N word.

Featuring Luna, Alex, Sam, and Linus.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Kanye West – Gold Digger

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006 – Conflict Oopsies

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Hey fellow #Resistance soldiers! We’re back at it again on the online with your favourite politics podcast that sometimes discusses the intricacies of the Red Hot Chili Peppers. This week, we discuss Canadian racism, another God damn school shooting, making Football Racist Again and Meryl Streep playing liberal improv. Also Jeff Bezos? More like Jeff BOZO!

Featuring Matt, Brooks, Zach, and Patrick.

Music used:

The Taxpayers – Evil Men
Killa $al – More Krazy Money

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