Prime Cuts

What if you were like 2 weeks old or whatever and inadvertently scanned an Autobot scientist's drone as your alternate mode, and then you meet him in the woods while you're looking for a monster from Filipino folklore? What if you and your sister got into a fight so bad you accidentally stumble into a secret government blacksite and almost get murdered by a former war criminal's training program? What if you won the big gaming tournament but none of your family were around to celebrate with you because you had unwittingly isolated yourself from your own traditions? What if…

We learned a lot this week on Transformers Earthspark; baby cows are really cute, never take teaching advice from Megatron, Witwicky Pennsylvania has some robust rail infrastructure that is used entirely by shady secret organizations, rules are important, the chore chart is VERY important, never trust a guy named Swindle (we've heard this one before), and professional wrestling inspires bad behavior in young viewers. But the one thing we DIDN'T learn is who the hell taught Optimus about fakeout voicemail messages. Noise Space | Discord

New year, new show, same us. In a first for the podcast, we're covering a show that neither of the hosts have seen, Earthspark! We talk about the extremely strong first showing for this series with 'Secret Legacy'. Some great casting choices, cool designs, a fascinating setup for our characters, and the most engaging human cast we've ever had means we're pretty high on Earthspark so far. Also, damn these kids fall down hills a lot! They're gonna skin a knee! Noise Space | Discord

Animated Season 2 left us with a lot of questions. If Sari is a techno-organic hybrid, how come she caught a cold that one time? Why did the Constructicons not ever get a toy? How come Ratchet fucked up that bad? Why does Nero have such an atrocious Ronald Reagan impression? Will Hasbro ever answer for cancelling Animated Season 4? Is Slo-Mo single? At least some of these questions will be answered on this very podcast! Noise Space | Discord

Well, we've reached the end of TFA Season 2. Lots happens this week. Starscream flirts with his externalized girlboss aspect, Sari remakes Home Alone (complete with Joe Pesci), Ratchet reunites with his ex-boyfriend (a sentient weapon of mass destruction), Bulkhead's engineering skills are finally recognized, and shocking revelations about Sari's origin are teased in literally the last 30 seconds of the episode. But before we get into ANY of that Audrey tells Nero about the greatest comment ever left on a Transformers smutfic. Noise Space | Discord

ATTEN-SHUN! THIS WEEK WE ARE TALKING ABOUT EPISODES NINE AND TEN OF TRANSFORMERS ANIMATED SEASON TWO! THEY ARE CALLED 'AUTOBOOT CAMP' AND 'BLACK FRIDAY'! THE FOLLOWING EVENTS WILL BE DESCRIBED IN DETAIL BY YOUR HOSTS; BUMBLEBEE AND BULKHEAD MEET IN BOOT CAMP, BUMBLEBEE ACCIDENTALLY TORTURES SENTINEL PRIME, BUMBLEBEE GETS HIS LEGS RIPPED OFF, BUMBLEBEE IS TRICKED INTO FRAMING AN INNOCENT BOT FOR SPYING, GRIMLOCK HAS A BIG CRUSH ON A GOTH SPIDER, MELTDOWN OFFERS TO MURDER SOMEONE FOR SARI, SURPRISE SCIENCE BONDAGE, AND BUMBLEBEE FAILS THE SHUT UP CHALLENGE!! NOW DROP AND GIVE ME 20 TRANSFORM UPS YOU ROBO-MAGGOTS!! (Sorry…

As we hit the middle of Animated's second season we begin to get some pretty mid episodes, even if one of them has strangely good animation for no reason. However, that doesn't mean there aren't plenty of things to talk about. This week, Prowl gets caught up in a silly drug metaphor (where the representation of drugs is corpse bits that give you superpowers) while hunting down Starscream with Lockdown, only to find that there are several more Starscreams running around than there used to be. Then we collect all our various human supervillains into the Society of Ultimate Villainy,…

BADA BING BADA BOOM we're back in the Mix(master) with Transformers Animated, and it's time to meet some more new guys! Bumblebee gets into a rivalry with a cool blue street racer who surely will not turn out to be a named character any time in the future. Then Bulkhead meets some real blue collar guys who were quite literally born yesterday. Will he be able to guide his rough around the edges pals away from Megatron's beguiling influence? Well since the episode is called "Rise of the Constructicons" probably not. Now sit the hell down, crack open some crude…

It's finally here. After alluding to the best montage of all time many times in our past episodes, we've finally arrived at Starscream getting murdered over and over again for 45 seconds. Oh, but don't worry, he's fine. He can't die anymore, and he intends to make this everyone else's problem. Also in this episode, Weird Al has a double meta guest spot, Sentinel and Magnus attempt to make Optimus commit perjury for national security reasons, Ratchet learns how to be nice (sort of), and we come up with the Worst Best Musician Stunt Casting idea in franchise history. Noise…

Listeners we are so fucking back...in Detroit, to be specific. We're starting our journey through TFA season 2, and already some nutso shit has happened. Sari Sumdac is (briefly) the world's youngest CEO, the AutoCops have stopped by to investigate all these claims about Decepticons and Allsparks and whatnot, the Headmaster has returned to torment the Autobots (and the Audience), and Professor Sumdac is being forced to do Megatron's evil bidding. But don't worry about all that! Just chillax and watch some Cocomelon with Bulkhead and Bumblebee! Noise Space | Discord