City Girls Make Do

What a great episode for us, personally, as people who hate Carrie/Berger and love Charlotte/Harry. Berger has pretty much peaked as pissbaby of the earth this week in season 6 episode 6: Hop, Skip, and a Week. Meanwhile, king Harry is back and pretty much kills us with how good he is. The other storylines are kinda boring tbh but it’s fine because we live for the drama of World’s Stupidest Way to Break Up With Someone.

You know that 30 Rock bit? Okay good. This week we watched season 6 episode 5, Lights, Camera, Relationship! Our usual storylines are still going… Miranda is pining over Steve, Charlotte is missing Harry, Samantha is horny for Smith, and we’re hooting and hollering GET HIS ASS about Carrie and Berger.

Oops we got a little riled and rambly on this one! The episode of the week was season 6 episode 4, Pick-a-Little, Talk-a-Little, AKA the episode that inspired He’s Just Not That Into You. It’s one of those weird ones where Carrie is somehow one of the more valid characters, even though her and Berger’s romance is extremely painful to watch. Unrelated to the gals, we also discuss taxidermied horses, Fiona Apple, and what Boardwalk Empire has in common with Alex’s sex dreams.

Another week, another episode where Charlotte is the most valid character. This time we’re discussing season 6 episode 3, The Perfect Present. In this one, Carrie has some absolutely galaxy brain takes about what’s appropriate for her to do while “casually” dating Berger, Miranda is on her like third??? episode being mad at Steve because she loves him?? And also, Charlotte completes her magical girl transformation to the Jewish faith.

Bust out your kosher wine for this one! This week we’re discussing season 6 episode 2, Great Sexpectations. You know, like the Dickens (haha dick) book. It turns out that some people just aren’t eating any vegetables!! At least, the gals in our favourite show aren’t. But it’s fine because we have a good week getting introduced to Smith, the main himbo of the series, plus we get Charlotte working her ass off to convert. Amen!

Welcome to season 6 of Stonks and the City! This week’s episode is titled To Market, To Market, whatever the fuck that means. Turns out, the stock market makes bimbos of us all. In other news, three of our gals are investing (get it) in their men with varying amounts of relationship profit (do you get it though). And then there’s Samantha whose plot is literally just insider trading. Stonks!

Apologies about our audio issues this week – Alex’s audio is lower quality for the first 30 minutes but then it goes back to normal.We made it to the season 5 finale, I Love A Charade! The gals are off to a wedding in the Hamptons, but they’re being kind of judgmental this week and we’re annoyed about it. If only they could be as unproblematic as Betty Draper. We also get the return of Berger which is painful, but at least it’s offset by how much we love Harry, who finally gets to meet the other girls. Plus, a…

In the penultimate episode of season 5, The Big Journey, we get the most seriously disturbing case of anti-train propaganda that has ever been aired on television (sorry, HBO). Carrie and Samantha are traveling by train to San Fransisco, and they are too horny to function. Meanwhile, Charlotte is also horny and struggling with the concept of sleeping with someone she thinks is ugly. Miranda doesn’t exist this week.

It’s time to bust out your Hitachi Magic Wand, because our best boy Harry is finally here! We’ve made it to season 5 episode 6, Critical Condition. This week is all about saying fuck it to the haters and not listening to our bad reviews, even when they might be devastatingly true and you should feel bad about it. And as always, Carrie should feel bad.

Plus One Is the Loneliest Number… according to the title of season 5 episode 5. But really no one is that lonely this week, because Charlotte and Miranda are having their first post-marriage and post-baby fucks, Stanford has his boyfriend, and Carrie has a million people showing up for her book party. We also get to meet the dreaded Berger (not to be confused with previous guest of the podcast Burger) who we just don’t care for. Cynical men get fucked challenge! (But not by Carrie, please.)