Prime Cuts

You guys have been requesting this one for like almost two years at this point so it's time that we finally got around to this campy murderdoll in our nonlinear exploration of robots in film. M3gan is a clever and funny little horror movie which takes full advantage of its premise, as well as the talents of its lead performers. The prosthetics, voice work, and physical acting of the titular toy combine to make one hell of a good time. So crank up that Skatt Brothers record and break it down alongside M3gan as we recap and review the film!…

This week Optimus Prime reaches new heights of child endangerment, Jawbreaker learns that sometimes it feels good to go apeshit, and KEITH DAVID appears?! Sounds crazy, right? Well forget all that shit, the REAL important thing is that they included a genus of Dinosaur that's likely been invalidated, AND put its fossils in the wrong area!!!! Man, I hope somebody got FIRED for that blunder!! Noise Space | Discord

Ahhh, Da Big City. No tellin' what you'll experience if you spend a night there. Maybe you'll have a wonderful bonding experience with another queer person. Maybe you will experience a micro-agression. Maybe you will have to give your mentor a Stone Cold Stunner while a bird with a Southern accent mocks you, and then fight a dinosaur. One things for sure though, your physically imposing older sibling WILL be mind controlled by an increasingly unhinged maniac in a bid to rid the world of your kind, and will only be thwarted by some kind of insane space magic. These…

Technically this podcast covers two more episodes of Transformers Earthspark, "Bear Necessities" and "Warzone". We make lots of jokes about Annihilation (2018 film), speculate about why GHOST seems to be purposefully tainting wildlife with industrial waste, discuss Sexy Shockwave, and celebrate the return of Steve Blum as Starscream. Then about halfway through we stumbled upon one of the greatest fanwork ideas of all time and it sort of distracted us for the rest of the episode. Noise Space | Discord

Oh boy, here we go again. Tarantulus is back. I bet he's gonna be weird and gross and offputting and...oh? What's that? He's kind and complicated and genuinely concerned for Nightshade? Well, I guess anything can happen in Earthspark. Well, I'm sure Bumblebee has no deeper reason to risk breaking his cover just to do some silly races. Oh? He's trying to find his long lost friend from before the war separated by allegiances but connected by their love of daredevilry? Well golly gee. Well, at least we know one thing; Schloder is just some goofball GHOST agent, nothing else…

Last time on Earthspark three new babies joined the cast. Now it's time to figure out whats up with them! One of them loves movies and the internet, one of them is a nice boy with severe anxiety, and one of them is impossibly good at advanced engineering projects. We also get more clues about GHOST being completely FINE and NORMAL, Nightshade meets a cow, Hashtag makes a movie, and Jawbreaker talks to Elita One. This show is insanely good, by the way. Noise Space | Discord

OKAY, EARTHSPARK!! These two episodes are absolutely packed with incredible stuff, too much to fit into a measly description, so instead I will give you a list of out of context phrases which relate to some cool shit that happens in this episode; Fusion Cannon Piledriver, Goth Baddie Skywarp, Megatron Energy Shibari, Quintus Prime, Three New Guys, Toxic Plane Yuri, Mandroid Boss Fight, and AMAZING TWITCH MOMENTS. We talked about these episodes for over twice their runtime so thats how you KNOW its good. Noise Space | Discord

Earthspark continues to provide us with all time great incarnations of classic characters. Rowdy Southern Arcee? Yes please! Frenzy with blue hair and pronouns? Sign us up! Soundwave disillusioned and betrayed by Megatron's turn? Wowee!! And the kids go to SCHOOL?!?!?!? ...well okay that one isn't actually all that exciting. But they DO basically watch their adopted robot siblings die, so, you know...anyway, block this goddang overhead!! Noise Space | Discord | That cool Rumble fan design we talked about

What if you were like 2 weeks old or whatever and inadvertently scanned an Autobot scientist's drone as your alternate mode, and then you meet him in the woods while you're looking for a monster from Filipino folklore? What if you and your sister got into a fight so bad you accidentally stumble into a secret government blacksite and almost get murdered by a former war criminal's training program? What if you won the big gaming tournament but none of your family were around to celebrate with you because you had unwittingly isolated yourself from your own traditions? What if…

We learned a lot this week on Transformers Earthspark; baby cows are really cute, never take teaching advice from Megatron, Witwicky Pennsylvania has some robust rail infrastructure that is used entirely by shady secret organizations, rules are important, the chore chart is VERY important, never trust a guy named Swindle (we've heard this one before), and professional wrestling inspires bad behavior in young viewers. But the one thing we DIDN'T learn is who the hell taught Optimus about fakeout voicemail messages. Noise Space | Discord